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15 Essential New Year's Resolutions

(If You're Not a Jerk)

Let's be real. We're in the day and age where being "woke" is what's cool. Even if it feels good to repost something semi-controversial (in the eyes of your right-wing uncle), it's not doing a whole lot. Here are some actionable steps if you're legitimately fed up with the state of the world right now, particularly, the U.S. Already accomplished some of these? Give yourself a pat on the back and accomplish the rest. 

1. Abandon your leaders .

Forget white feminism. Forget your white-dude leader. Follow the leadership of the marginalized or those who rally behind and for the marginalized. Join them. They’re your leaders now. Embrace it. 

2. Stop treating black kids like criminals.

Biased treatment of students of color only reinforces the school-to-prison pipeline we've created. Black students are consistently punished more severely for the same behavior exhibited by white students starting as early as preschool. 

3. Close the wage gap.

Studies estimate that women won't make as much as men for the exact same work until 2133. That's 115 years too many. Employers, take a cold hard look at your payroll.

4. Make the minimum wage a living wage.

Working families are forced to rely on billions in public assistance. Taxpayers are paying for what businesses refuse to. We're all pissed about this in some way or another, so let's just fix this. Please. #greedybusiness

5. Put an end to mass shootings.

The U.S. sees a mass shooting nearly every day, and more than 30 Americans are murdered with firearms daily. It's well past-due for us to stand up to the NRA and do something about it.

6. Stop blaming people with mental illness for gun violence.

Most people with mental illness are not violent, and that most violent crimes are committed by people who are not mentally ill. Case closed.

7. Believe sexual assault survivors.

Stop believing sexual assault is inevitable. Stop discrediting women based on what someone else has done, lied about, etc. Imagine if we applied that type of "logic" to our everyday lives... Also, can we get the **** to work on testing the ridiculous backlog of untested rape kits?

8. Reject Islamophobia.

Let's prove that humanity is better than this. Please?

9. Keep choice-driven reproductive health care safe, legal and accessible.

At the very least, allow women to make decisions about their own reproductive rights. What's with all these white men thinking they know what's best for our bodies?

10. Research where you put your money.

For example, Oreo and Expedia are brands that support gay marriage and Hobby Lobby refuses to cover birth control. Honestly, we'll take any excuse to eat more Oreos. 

11. Embrace your emotions.

Women, in particular, are pegged as "crazy" when they show emotions. Feelings are human. Feel more. Empathize more. Make the world a better place. Didn't we learn this when we were like five?

12. Stop apologizing for no reason.

Women, stop apologizing for simple things, and Men, stop accepting and expecting those apologies. #NotSorry

13. Don't Judge

Everyone has a different way of living. Accept it. Respect it. Embrace it.

14. Treat climate change like the epidemic it really is.

I'm looking at you, 45. 

15. Vote

For the love of the flying spaghetti monster, please vote. 

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